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...just an ordinary fangirl ;)
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| | Current Music: | And One - Body Pop | | Current Location: | At Home | | Subject: | SPN-Wallpapers 1280x1024 | | Time: | 04:08 pm |
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| Hi!
Ok, I became a fangirl of SPN just last month - but since that moment I was annoyed that the 2006 TVGuide photo-shoot images are soooo small.
Yesterday I played around with my Blow-Up plugin in Photoshop and finally made some wallpapers. I know, they aren't very sharp and really blurry - but at least I have a monitor full of Jensen now to look at *drools*
Teaser:
 
(the link will get you to a separate site on my homepage - outside LJ)
So, thank you for looking and hopeful you like what you'll see!
To all of you who are on the Asylum Convention - be sure I envy you SO much! *grmpf*
Have a great time! *can't wait for the new episode tonight*
Fen | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment   |
| | Tags: | supernatural | | Subject: | My first fan video - Supernatural | | Time: | 08:41 am |
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| Wow!
Two weeks ago I started watching SPN - after the first episode I was hooked and then four days of hardcore-watching-TV followed *lol*
Then I experienced the SPN fandom, here at LJ...it's mind blowing what I missed two years! How could I????
But now I'm trying to make a little bit of my own stuff...and because I've listened to some awesome music by Within Temptation in the last time, I wanted to create my own, dramatic, sad fan video.
I never did the whole clip editing thing before so there surely are some mistakes, but hey - it's my first!
Hopefully you'll like what you see - If you do, it would be awesome to let me know! And if you don't, i would like to know too ;)
So, here are the details:
Song: "The heart of everything"
Artist: Within Temptation
Characters: Sam/Dean, very minor glimpses of Jo, Jess, Bobby
Clips used/Spoilers: Heart, Croaton, Scarecrow, Nightmare, BuabS, Hell House, Pilot, Devils's Trap....I hope I got all
Rating: PG-13 or R (?) - Blood, Violence, character death
Summary: Dean remembers the past and what they've all been through but he has to make a choice.
Category: Drama, Angst
After trying some LJ-Cuts...I failed...so I'm just able to provide a link to Youtube...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oo0f6gLq8Xg ...and in the meantime I'm going to browse for help ;)
Updated: Because YouTube is a pain in the a** today, I uploaded the file now...it's size is 23,64 MB.
Here you go:
Either http://www.sendspace.com/file/xovv72
or http://www.megaupload.com/de/?d=VYSK9E61
Thank you for your time and watching!! | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | A lifesign and an explanation. | | Time: | 11:33 am |
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| Hi there... just wanted to say "hi" to you all.
I haven't been active for such a long time - because
1) I'm really, really busy earning money,
2) my creativity left me over the last years and I can't sit down and draw anymore. I honestly don't know why - I'd love to participate but I have nothing to offer *sighs*,
3) and my life is so boring, there's nothing to say. Really. You don't want to read it. Promised.
BUT:
I read my friend's entries regularly. I "lurk" around, passively. Yes, it's very pathetic, but I told you above, I can't be an active member right now.
So if any of you wonder why I still friend you - that's because I love what you do! Your fanart, your art in general, I adore it and would love to see it in the future. So I hope (!) that you don't mind getting friended by me. Don't worry, I won't bite - I'm just a nice girl that doesn't have much time.
Thank you for your understanding!!
Nad. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | New Art Doodle | | Time: | 02:04 am |
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| After reading HBP right after the publication (arrghhh..I've read it in 10 hours and then my head started to hurt and I had to cry a little because I couldn't stand the thought that Snape should really be evil and out of relief that Draco wasn't the one who died *lol*) I had SO many scenes in my head which I (still) want to draw. But...nope...no skills/creativity left! It's one year now since I drew HP Art. *sniffles*
But last week I was on holydays and finally! Yesterday I drew this sketch without a reference! *wheee* Today I scanned it and tried some things in Painter. It's not really good, but I'm relived that I could paint at least something!
(Yes, the neck is a bit odd....)
Hope you like!
( Mother's Finest ) | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | Just in case... | | Time: | 05:41 pm |
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| ...some of you wondered if I'm still alive - indeed I am. Almost half a year is gone without writing into my LJ. But now, I have a long break until september (new LOST episodes *argghhh*) to fill and! Harry Potter 6 is soon coming out! I can't wait!
And so, I think there will be more from me soon :)
Take care you all! | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | Eeeeemmmm... | | Time: | 11:55 am |
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| ...I'm still alive - sorry for no art, no comments, nothing...
but I feel so exhausted these days, RL is a real bitch. I have no time for drawing at all. The last days I want to be somewhere else...
And the most depressing thing is christmas time...because 1999 on christmas day (!!!) my best friend Jessica died, age 21. It was the horriblest christmas ever and since then I can't be happy between christmas and new year. She was the best whatever happened to me and a year before her death we had bad arguments and 5 days before her death we saw each other again and wanted to "make peace" (she lived far away from me, so we couldn't see each other and the letters didn't make it right...) - but before we could discuss everything, she died.
I miss her so much.
Sorry for RL-stuff...but I hope some of you won't forget me and don't think I'm a lazy or ignoring person....
I read my friend's entries as often as I can and I think of all of you!!
Huge, huge hugs!!!! | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | New Art! | | Time: | 01:54 pm |
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| After a long break - I started drawing again! I was stressed by creating web design, by real life.. by everything! And so I just sat down, listened to some music and painted a Harry. Why I still don't know because as you know, I like Draco more. But then...I scanned the sketch, doodled around and suddenly... I saw those eyes. And I fell deeply in love with this Harry. And now I can't get enough of it. Isn't that strange to say that about your own drawing? Sorry, but I really am surprised of this drawing myself. *shakes head*
Anyway. I hope you like him!!! I would like to dedicate this image to the sweet ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) khames - you are a sunshine, darling! I hope your knee will be better soon! I cross all the fingers I have. I don't know why, but I had to think of you while I drew this - how I came across your OMG!Harry pic the first time and how often you made my days with your wonderful images. You are a very cute and lovely person and I'm happy I've met you! Hope you like my Little!Harry and please get well soon! (even if you won't see the image until you're back home!)
Title:"Too much to bear sometimes"
Harry, Rating G
I would be very happy if the people who like it or dislike it would leave a feedback! I like critique in either way - but I don't know what I could do better - and for me - it's all about the eyes. I love them.
Hugs to all!
nJay
xxx
PS: Please...if you use the image somewhere somehow - credit me! Thank you! | | comments: 45 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | Today no original art but a coloring ... | | Time: | 09:19 am |
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| ... for the lovely linnpuzzle! (yes, SHE was it who did this image originally, I just colored :)
I mean, I don't now how to color exactly. But this time it doesn't matter, because it was so much fun. I hope you like it anyway what I did with your Oberon, Hon!!
So, dear guests... again (because of all that important copyright stuff!!!) this image was NOT created by me, I just colored it! Please visit linnpuzzle's Live Journal and leave a comment there, she's a fantastic artist. I adore every single piece of art created by her. She's the best!
And a short update for all who are thinking why is this stupid, lazy apox not updating her journal with a new image? Eh???
You're right. I *am* lazy.... but just in drawing :) I'm a bit exhausted these days... I work every day on my website - I HAVE to, because I need it as a portfolio. So... I have a drawing of younger!Lucius waiting on my hard disc... but he still has to wait a few....days...weeks? Hopefully not.
I hope everybody is ok.... Love you all!
nJay
PS: And thank you to everybody who friended me, who leaves a comment and/or has a look right now! *HUGS* | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| Wherever I read is disappointment.... and I agree so much.
I couldn*t believe my ears when I listened to the radio this morning and read all your entries. How could this happen? And how can someone rule a country if the half of this country doesn't want him???
*shakes head*
I feel so sorry for you. *hugs to all who are disappointed* | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | New art today.... | | Time: | 07:54 pm |
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| As I promised, a new pic... and I had a story in my head while I painted this... but because I'm not good at writing... there won't be a fic. *sniff* So just imagine :)
I'm not entirely satisfied with this pic, but it is something new for me. The pose is inspired from an advert I sa in "GQ Style". The thing on his head is a fur coat/hat and he is pulling it back... something like this. Hope you like it!
Rating: G, I guess, because there's absolutely nothing happening :)
"Yes father, it's done."
CU,
nJay | | comments: 48 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | Life isn't always nice... | | Time: | 08:34 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/sad.gif) sad |
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| ...no, it really is'nt.
Ok, first, my hubby and me, we're done with moving. We did a lot the last 3 weeks in our new apartment but it still sucks and looks like shit. I have no work and money is running out, but I'm happy. OK: Stop! I WAS happy. Until yesterday.
Wanna know?
My PC.... did some strange days...the last few days. But yesterday... my hard disk... made REALLY strange things and finally: Strange noises. And guess what: Yep, it was the hard disc with the most important stuff ever on it. ALL my pictures I collected from all the wonderful Artists...ALL my Fan fiction collection (and it was BIIIIG, HUUUUGE!!!), ALL my music, all my university stuff... no, I think I saved this :/ - anyway, I was about to save it on CD-ROM the next week (because it's so big, I have to plan it ahead *strange girl I am*) - and now.... POOOF. Gone. Byebye.
The most horrible thing was when I realized that my original paintings were on that harddrive (I made partitions of it) - you know, and there was even my newest image on it, the one I haven't showed you yet (it's a bad Draco *giggles*) - and I went mad. I wanted to die.... but then, my lovely hubby said: Look, what I safed for you! And there it was... all my painted images! At least, something went well.
But I AM sad. A bit desperate. Because I don't have the money for recovery specialists. But I keep the hard disk and maybe one day I can pay for the recovery. At least, I can see all the files via Linux and now they are there. Somewhere I can't get them *sighs heavily*
Ok, bad luck.
For my newest image, I hope I can upload it until the weekend. I use hubby's computer right now and have to install my FTP-proggie, use all of his disk space *hehe* and try my best.
I wish you all the best and CU soon!
nJay | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Hiya! *waves*
I'm here, in Cologne and using this horrible PC to browse around a bit... but as you can guess, it's not easy to read everything. Hopefully I'm online in two weeks. Hubby already managed everything and now we have to wait for everything to get online. Complicated, eh?
I'm not really creative because I have to clean and to un-pack my boxes full of books and clothes. *arrrgghhh*
But I hope I can paint soon again!
Hope you are all healthy and in a good mood, cu soon!
nJay | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Ok... I'm moving tomorrow... and I don't know when I can be on-line again... maybe and hopefully in two weeks. Last week I started a new image and I'm finished now. At least I can't and won't do anything more. I looked at it now for seven days and I can't see it anymore - ;)
So I claim it to be finished *yaaay*
I usually planned to upload it with a story, because the image is build on that story... and I wrote 3/4 of the story, re-read it but it's horrible. And because I don't have anymore time... I leave the story :) But it's something about Harry leaving Draco to save the Wizarding World and Draco's hurt feelings - and sadness, lovesickness.... just the simple cliche. Maybe you can imagine a bit :)
Ahhh. I tried a bit more realism in this image... but the only result is that the boys look more like ordinary boys... nothing hot and not really recognizable as Harry/Draco (just the hair). I'm a bit disappointed of myself... but maybe they shouldn't be hot... just sad.
Sooo, I'm packing now... my PC, my tablet... *sniffs*
Thanks for looking and reading...
I'll miss you!
Maybe I can keep up with all the postings in your live journals via Internet Cafe :)
CU soon!
All the best, nJay
And the detail:
ETA: I don't like it that much like my other two images... so please don't be cruel *puppy eyes*... I know it's not very good... *sighs and leaves* | | comments: 7 comments or Leave a comment |
| *sighs heavily*
Sometimes I get really melancholic when I read HP or FanFics. As we all know, a main, important issue in all the HP books is the wonderful friendship between Harry, Ron and Hermione. I wonder sometimes if friendships like this are rare in our world or just in *my* world. I don't know anyone around me (ok, my parents) who would say: "you'd first have to kill us blah blah" like Hermione did in PoA. Ok, there are fights between them three, but after all they can forgive each other, they *know* each other and their personalities. When Harry gets angry and confused in OotP they don't get angry with Harry too but understand him after all. I mean: If *I* would get angry in front of my friends, I don't know if they would be there for me so easily. So is this friendship just fantasy? I think not. Most times, friendships like these start in the childhood and grow with the people. Sadly, my friendships from school do not exist anymore after a lot of disappointments and, cruelly enough, after one's death. And I have the feeling that the friendships you make when you are a grown-up are often not that stable. At least, mine aren't. And that saddens me. I have the feeling that no one is really interested in each other anymore...in the real world. I guess, many ppl (including me) are shifting their social life into the WWW. I mean I know ppl better I met through communities etc than my own neighbours! So that's positive for me in a way: I can exchange myself, my interests, like here, in Live Journal. And it's great! But of course you can't compare this to a friendship like the Trio's. Because, after all,
So in my opinion that's why *I* myself enjoy reading HP so much. It shows me a world full of trust, friendship, forgiveness and naturalness. I mean, the Weasleys: How natural they "adopted" Harry and do everything for him. Or what is interesting for me because of my momentary situation: The issue that Harry has not to worry about his daily life. Ok, he has a lot to worry about, Voldy, and now girls and his parents etc. But: When he's hungry, he gets something to eat. He has a roof above his head. Hogwarts offers him everything he needs without having to pay. (Or does Hogwarts takes money from the students so they can go there??) Even if, luckily his parents have left him enough money and he's rich. If he needs to go somewhere, there is always someone who helps him. If the Weasley pick him up or if a group fetches him by broom... he has never to worry about the "how".
And we, in our real life have to worry, especially about the "how". Sometimes I wish I wouldn't have to worry about all this daily stuff and had instead to wonder about how to safe the world *snickers*. It would be a nice change to the life I live right now. But we always want what we have not. But: That's why HP makes me melancholic sometimes. (And: Of course that's not just the HP universe, it's almost every book and movie... that's why it's called fantasy... I know...)
Oh, I guess this post is senseless and just a personal problem... but I can improve my english writing. At least. And if you're still with me at this point: Thanks for your time!
nJay | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| Today I'm feeling down. So down I can't believe it. My car broke yesterday and I don't have much more money to get it fixed. It's something with the engine so it's really bad and it would be really expensive. The problem is that I move next weekend to cologne, with my hubby, and we need all our money (especially when there's not much left) for the transport of our stuff. And the irony of it all: The last two weeks I had my car 3 times repaired (breaks, oil, wheels...) so I really thought everything's ok now. I was wrong. And I'm feeling ill, despaired and so angry.
It was yesterday and if all this was not enough I got a bad headache in the evening. Anyway, I started to paint a new pic... it really helped a lot. Just painting and seeing how everything's coming together, creating an image. Of course, it's not ready, but I'm happy that I begun it even with all the shit which happened to me.
And I read chapter 8 of the fanfic: The Awakening Power by Sib and this fic is written soooo well! Check it out if you already haven't because I#m late with all the fanfics around...
And thanks to the_plebe, I try to link to an image... right now... hopefully I did understand it right :)
Ok, the first one (I already told you about those 2 pics in my last post... so don't wonder)
Draco PG-13
And the second: Draco/Harry PG-13
You can have them a bit bigger on my web page Here
So, I hope it works.
Have a better time then me!
nJay | | comments: 29 comments or Leave a comment |
| Hi!
Right now I'm really angry with myself. I really really read a lot of Fanfics. I really do understand almost everything. The words I do not know I find in my dictionary and remember them (ok, my brain works, thanks!). BUT: When I try to write myself -even all these posts at Live journal or the stuff at my own weppage...- I can't remember words. I don't know how to put some sentences together. When I re-read it, it sounds like shit. That's not ok! Am I stupid? Incapable? I feel sooo ashamed! Why is that so? Understand everything, can't do anything. Ok, english is not my language, I guess everybody will see that at first sight, but IF I understand, why can't I write?? *pities herself*
Anyway... I painted 2 more pictures! I wish I could upload them to Livejournal but I'm not able to understand how this works (*hint,hint* - some tips, please?)- and so I will upload them to my web page. On one image you can see Draco's pupic hair and my Mom (who visited me today) said that it looks like he has ejaculated all over it and that I should paint it in another way... *cries* <- That's the big problem: I don't know how!!! I can't paint this bloody pupic hair, I mean, I hate pubic hair, so I don't want to paint it... but a shaved Draco???? Noooo....
So I will just upload the "old" version until I know how top do better.
Please tell me if it's really that bad. I'm open for honest critcism. And I will do a few LJ icons. Maybe you like them.
Thank you for reading!
nJay | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| Well, I updated my HP - Wanna see? with two photoshop painted pieces of work. They are the only two so far and the first ones I ever painted. I hope you like them anyway. It would be nice if you could tell me what you think about *looks nervous around her*
Everything else on this web page is still under construction.
I have stomachache - I'm going to bed now :/
CU!
nJ | | comments: 10 comments or Leave a comment |
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...just an ordinary fangirl ;)
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